My slow descent into madness
For the most part, people can't tell that I'm slowly going insane. But I can tell. I see it happening in little ways, each day.
For example, last week at work, the nameplate of one of my coworkers fell off his door. Another coworker walked by, saw the name on the floor, and mentioned it out loud. "John Smith* fell on the floor." I overheard, and I burst out laughing uncontrollably for about 10 minutes. I had to shut my office door because I was so loud.
A few days later, I was alone in the bathroom and I thought about it again. I started giggling like mad. Someone walked in while I was laughing in the stall. I had to stay in there until she left, so she wouldn't know who I was. Shoot! I forgot to lift my feet up. She probably saw my shoes and figured out it was me. Sigh, now they'll all know I'm mad.
I try not to think about the nameplate on the floor anymore. Otherwise I start laughing.
Crap. I just thought about it. heeheeheehahaha. Shoot, brb.
Phew, haha, ok. Anyway.
Also, I've decided that crazy people sleep a lot. I spent the weekend sleeping. The entire weekend, I was asleep. I wasn't tired. I just didn't want to be awake. Well, I was awake for a few hours. On Saturday, I woke up at around 6pm to drive around for no apparent reason. I was afraid that driving around aimlessly could be a sign of madness. So I stopped by KFC and bought a gigantic bucket of chicken. In my twisted mind, a whole bucket is less crazy than a 2 piece meal. All I really wanted was a Coke. But they only have Pepsi there. I ate some of the chicken but ended up throwing most of it away. Then I went back to sleep. I woke up again soon after because my friends, David & Lynna, asked me to come out for dessert. We almost ate frog ejaculate at a Chinese dessert place. (Do a google search on "crystal snow"). Thank God we didn't. Chinese people are gross.
Sunday (today), I woke up for the third time. It was around 1pm. I watched some tv and decided I was tired of being awake, so I went back to sleep. Then I woke up again in the evening to have a fight with my mom. I'm tired.
Tomorrow I'll have to get up for real and pretend to be a functioning member of society again.
*My coworker's name is Mike Cox...
For example, last week at work, the nameplate of one of my coworkers fell off his door. Another coworker walked by, saw the name on the floor, and mentioned it out loud. "John Smith* fell on the floor." I overheard, and I burst out laughing uncontrollably for about 10 minutes. I had to shut my office door because I was so loud.
A few days later, I was alone in the bathroom and I thought about it again. I started giggling like mad. Someone walked in while I was laughing in the stall. I had to stay in there until she left, so she wouldn't know who I was. Shoot! I forgot to lift my feet up. She probably saw my shoes and figured out it was me. Sigh, now they'll all know I'm mad.
I try not to think about the nameplate on the floor anymore. Otherwise I start laughing.
Crap. I just thought about it. heeheeheehahaha. Shoot, brb.
Phew, haha, ok. Anyway.
Also, I've decided that crazy people sleep a lot. I spent the weekend sleeping. The entire weekend, I was asleep. I wasn't tired. I just didn't want to be awake. Well, I was awake for a few hours. On Saturday, I woke up at around 6pm to drive around for no apparent reason. I was afraid that driving around aimlessly could be a sign of madness. So I stopped by KFC and bought a gigantic bucket of chicken. In my twisted mind, a whole bucket is less crazy than a 2 piece meal. All I really wanted was a Coke. But they only have Pepsi there. I ate some of the chicken but ended up throwing most of it away. Then I went back to sleep. I woke up again soon after because my friends, David & Lynna, asked me to come out for dessert. We almost ate frog ejaculate at a Chinese dessert place. (Do a google search on "crystal snow"). Thank God we didn't. Chinese people are gross.
Sunday (today), I woke up for the third time. It was around 1pm. I watched some tv and decided I was tired of being awake, so I went back to sleep. Then I woke up again in the evening to have a fight with my mom. I'm tired.
Tomorrow I'll have to get up for real and pretend to be a functioning member of society again.
*My coworker's name is Mike Cox...
posted by Jacqueline A. Whole at
11:33 PM
5 Comments:
Sleeping a lot isn't a sign of madness! I love sleep.
i almost busted out laughing after reading what your coworker's name is. no wonder you were laughing so much!!!
sleep. mmm... so comfortable just thinking about it!
you're perfectly fine yo.
Oh crap! I just got that..."Mike Cox fell on the floor....I'm giggling....
mike cox? really? high. larious.
anytime you feel like more KFC, i'd be willing to go for a taco hell ride myself. i haven't had it in about two months. i'm kinda jonesing.
funny!
giggling in the bathroom stall- that's multitasking, not madness. speaking of which, your work load is pretty insane. no wonder you need to sleep!
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